Joining the wave: “A typical day at work”

Since describing your “typical day at work” is now the new trend according to some local insiders, aka Julie and chickenbutts, I have decided to join the wave in reporting what I do at my current job.
First of all, let me begin by telling everyone that I work at “Vento’s Pizza, located at 420 N. Hollow Ave. (in the corner of Home Depot parking lot). I work at a family owned business, which has its perks and its not-so perky advantages. In addition, I will note that I do not plan to make this my career. It is a pretty basic, non-thinking job. Sometimes it makes me want to die.
First of all, I have to explain that I have two different jobs. I have the Monday, Tuesday, Thursday job (we’ll refer to it as the “weekday” job) — and then I have a Friday, Saturday job (I’m inclined to be somewhat unoriginal and call this one the “weekend” job). I work 30 hours a week, 20 hours of it is devoted to my weekday job.

So we will start with my weekday job: Hostess by night
I come into work at approximately 5pm. Carl, the manager says “Hi Nellie, how are you?” I say “Great Carl, how are you?” He says “I’m good.” Then I put on my executive apron on and login to my very modern day cash-register. If a client comes in, I say “Hello, can I help you?” The client tells me what he or she would like to purchase, and I respond “Is this for here or for take out?” After the clients’ response, I choose the appropriate “Eat in” or “Take Out” option on my register. I carefully and explicitly customize their order according to each individuals preferences and then I announce the charge being made to his or her account. The client proceeds to make a payment to his or her account via cash that is withdrawn from various sources; via pockets, purses, shoes, armpits, wallets, etc. Sometimes this process can take upwards of 5 minutes so I economize on time by retrieving drinks that have been ordered if applicable. When I am not busy with a client, I help out on the unloading dock, directing pizza and sandwiches from the oven to boxes, bags, plates, or trays according to the client’s preference of eating environment. I also handle calls in the receiving department. When a client calls to place an order, I carefully record the order onto an order slip and act as a courier, delivering orders to their respective departments; pizza or grill. In addition to recording orders, I am also responsible for handling many customer service calls. Some customer queries that I handle inculde: status of order, hours of operation, services provided, return policies,and many other general questions.
When I am not preoccupied with clients, merchandise, or customer service, I spend my free time in the assembly department, assembling boxes. I assemble boxes of different sizes and stack them into piles. I am also responsible for the orderly maintenance of our clients’ visitation areas. I make sure that their spaces are kept orderly and tidy. When everything is in order, I spend many free moments drinking gallons of coffee so I can be coherent and conscious throughout my work-day.
Around 8pm, I check the status of our beverage inventory. If it is getting low, I go to the warehouse and load up the new inventory that is needed for replenishment. In the evening I spend time re-stocking the shelves so everything will be there the next morning. In addition to beverages, I re-stock napkins, forks, spoons, knives, straws, boxes, etc. Once everything has been re-stocked I make sure that everything in the work area is tidy. I sweep the floor, and clean up any other small messes that have been made. At 11pm, I go home. I get home between 11:15 – 11:30.

Now onto my weekend job: Chef extroidinare by day
This job is much more interesting than my “hostess” job. It requires a great knowledge in the fine art of pizza making. It is an intimate and precise job. First I would like to announce that other than being the great chef I am, I still hold many of the responsibilities that I did as hostess. For example, I still handle customer service, work on the unloading dock, and take orders in the receiving department.
I come into work at approximately 10am. Al, the owner greets me with a very “loud” and cheerful “Good Morning! How are you!” That always sets a chipper, yet deafening mood for the day. I begin my day by carefully spreading sauce and cheese onto fresh pizza dough from the bakery. After I have pre-made about 25 standard pizzas, I am content. Ok, I am getting really sick of talking about my day at work. Anyways, I make pizza. I make stromboli’s. Some people are retarded and need extra sauce, or no sauce, or no cheese, and I swear that they are insane. Sometimes people order bread with sauce on top. Some people want large pizzas with a different topping on each slice. Sometimes people order pizzas with every single topping on them and the pizza gets so heavy that I can barely lift it from the counter into the oven. When I work on pizza I smell disgusting and all of my clothes have pizza embedded into them. Before I leave I have to refill everything and rotate everything so all of the old stuff is on top. Frequently I spend a lot of time picking sausage out of the vegetables. I rinse the vegetables frequently, and damn … I would be pissed if I was a vegetarian because I can’t tell ya how much sausage disentigrates into the veggies. I would really like to organize a way to make the sausage die. Sausage is gross anyways. People are disgusting and 90% of them want pizza with pepperoni, sausage, and meat. I swear they want to die of obeseness or heart-attacks really soon. I hate touching anchovies. A surprisingly large amount of people want anchovies on their pizza. Anchovies smell like shit, and there are always these white balls floating around in the anchovy juice and I swear little anchovy fish are going to hatch. Uck. And the nastiest thing is people who, instead of pizza sauce, want anchovy sauce with cheese on top. Seriously, puke. Besides anchovy nastiness, pizza making is fun. I also make strombolis. That requires a lot of skills, but I have been proclaimed to be a fantastic stromboli maker. Yay. You roll out dough with a rolling pin, throw sutff in it, fold it up, brush butter on top, sprinkle parmesan cheese on top of that, stab it with a knife, and throw it in the oven. Mmm, good. I’m tired of talking about work now.
WORK SUCKS. I am also deeply involved in our lottery pool at work. I am going to win and become rich, so then I will have enough money to invest into the stock market, and then I will sit on a beach in like somewhere beachy for the rest of my life and sip on those drinks and sit under an umbrella.
Yeah!
OK DONE NOW.

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