Archive for May, 2005

I’m losin’ Cats

Sunday, May 29th, 2005

As usual, I’m attempting to recover from the winter time weight gain. Really, though … I have slowly been putting on weight since I began my sit-on-my-ass job last August, and my evening job of sitting on the couch eating cheetos. Unfortunately my metabolism did not accurately adjust to this change. My weight has always fluctuated due to work, school, anxiety & stress, overeating, hibernating during the winter months, etc. I’ve kind of hit a plateu with the steady job and overeating of the past year. The pant sizes climbed, the belly extended, and one day I looked at myself on the video conferencing TV at work when I was doing a test run. I was wearing navy pants and a sky blue shirt. And I looked like a teletubby.

On February 19th I decided to officially go on a diet. I busted out Cindy Crawford again and tried to stop eating cheetos and pizza … and french fries. I really enjoy the Cindy workout, but unfortunately I think it was making me gain weight. It is mostly a muscle building/fat burning workout, and I was definitey feelng sore in my ass and legs … and all the places I wanted to lose weight, but the fat wasn’t disappearing. Not even after a month of doing it at least 3-4x and week and not eating cheetos! I think I was definitely building some muscle under the heaping lumps of fat on my body, but that was not really the goal. I bought a rebounder and tried jumping on it for more cardio exercise but since I’m so uncoordinated, I kept twisting my ankles on it and felt like I was going to die. Anyways, a month later I evaluated my progress. I lost three pounds total and I still looked like a teletubby. So I got discouraged and quit.

My new goal is gradual and permanent weight loss. I’m not going to totally cut out the tasty things. I’m still going to eat french-fries, cheetos, and pizza … but just not very much. I’ve taught myself that diet pepsi and yogurt are really tasty, and that vegetables such as green peppers and mushrooms are not really that bad! I’ve been walking in Schenley park almost every day that doesn’t rain (which now is averaging about 3 days a week). I have also decided to weigh myself in cats so I can really evaluate progress. Instead of being sad that I have gained back a pound that wasn’t there yesterday, I have totally done away with the pound system. I have taken a number, the weight of Todd’s cat … since my cats can’t really represent an average cat. Cat weighs like 22 pounds, Cinder is a fat midget cat, and Nine — well he might be average but I have no idea how much he weighs. So, I’m using the weight of Todd’s cat. In the last month, I have lost a cat. So now I am happy to say that instead of 14 … I weight 13 cats! Ultimate goal: 11 cats. So, one down … two to go. That is so much easier than those pesky pounds!

Anyways, besides the cat losin’ which has been replacing my evening edition of Friends’ and Frasier, I still haven’t given up on Nick @ Nite, which is gradually changing to TV Land, since N@N only shows the Cosby show and Fresh Prince these days …. and you don’t need to read into that, I just don’t happen to care for those particular shows due to the fact that they are both a bit too Full House and not quite the adult humor I’m looking for.

I’ve been busy at work these days … nothing unusual. I got the best news EVER on Friday when the HR person called me and asked me if I could whip up a job description for her to give to some people she was interviewing. YES people, this means that I am losing 1/3 of my job and is the BEST news EVER! I’ve literally been in insane mode at work since about February when it was decided I was actually two people, had 6 arms and could actually get 20 hours worth of work done in 7 hours. After quite a few departmental meetings, a lot of complaining, and my insinuation that I wasn’t doing it anymore … which of course lead to the department gossip that I was quitting, ughh women … leading to the “concerned” meeting with HR lady and how much I’m valued as an employee, etc … and of course I had to explain to her that women are insane, but not her of course. So … it is almost official. I might finally stop hating my job.

I bought an MP3 player a few weeks ago and I LOVE it!!! L-O-V-E it! It is a Creative Muvo Micro, light blue and very pretty :). Too lazy to post a picture, but I recommend this brand to anyone thinking of purchasing one. It was a bit on the expensive side, but it is the 512 MB version, and you can get the cheaper 256MB one for about $40 less. If I had spent about $50 more I could have gone with the mini ipod, but I wanted something smaller, and I really don’t even think I have enough songs, or like enough songs, to fill up 4 GB. I can’t imagine what you’d do with the 60 GB ones!

Today I’m on a cleaning spree. I did laundry last night, but I must continue. I’m washing my couch covers, blankets, sheets, pillow cases, and things I’ve been neglecting like sweatshirts and bathrobes, etc. I’m on a mission! I bought some home interior type paint last night at Home Depot, and I’m going to FINALLY paint the shelf I got for Christmas and hang it up somewhere. It has hooks on it to hang coats and stuff, and I really need to put it up soon. I’ve stored all of my winter coats in the back of my closet, but I have like a zillion sweatshirts and umbrellas and purses that need a home. Todd said he was going to give me a bookcase and a little shelf. If he does, I will paint the shelf with the pink paint I bought and hang it off to the side of my pink couch with the pink couch cover so I can get some color in here. I purposely didn’t buy ANY dark colored paint cause this place doesn’t need to get any gloomier. Even though pink and light blue won’t match my orange carpet and the other ugly couch, who cares. I’m on a mission man. I need to spruce this little hole up for the summer months. I think I might also just completely knock out a wall and let the sun come in. Basement apartments suck for the summer, except that they stay nice and cool. I don’t miss living on the 3rd floor of an apartment complex.

I’m working on my “December 2006 plan”, so I’ll be busy with that along with everything else I do in my ever so crazy and exciting life (hint of sarcasm?). So I’ll try to update again soon. P.S. – My email doesn’t work so don’t write me with any urgent matters. I can access my webmail, however it takes me like 647 steps to get to it, and I’m spoiled with using Outlook Express. I don’t know what is wrong with it. I’ll try to get it fixed soon. So, if you need me ….. call me or IM me … or email me at work. Tata!

Why women suck

Tuesday, May 10th, 2005

That is going to be the title of my book. I love the quirky women who have a witty sense of humor, or even the loud mouths who just tell it like it is. I like the storytellers and the eyerollers, and the ones who go “God Damn I need a beer right now.”

But unfortunately all of the women I know want to model their lives around Desperate Housewives. Oh my God, I forgot my tanning lotion for the bed and I never go to the gym without tanning first! That was not an example, someone really said that today. I don’t know what is terribly wrong with that phrase, but I know that it makes me fantasize about a dead body in a pool of blood. I know a guy would never say that. And for example, If I said “kiss my butt” to a guy – he would laugh. But I couldn’t say that to a typical girl because she would get offended or think of me as uncool. I like to say that though. Or if I said “fuck” because something went wrong, a girl would be like “Oh my God are you ok?” and a guy would be like “haha, having one of those days eh?”. Why are girls such anal asswads? I think that they should make a show called “Desperate Ass-Sticks” and hold tryouts for it. And on the TV show, all the girls literally have to walk around all day with sticks up their asses as punishment for existing in this world.

The End.


Wednesday, May 4th, 2005

It is May and still cold. Now there is no heat in my apartment. I guess its broken, hope I don’t blow up and die. My heater blows out cold air. Seriously, it isn’t even like normal, it is COLD! I think it morphed into an air conditioner overnight. I hope it gets fixed today. It is going to be 35 tonight. That is all I have time for. I have to go back to work and die. Oh yeah. I got flowers today! They are shriveling up on my desk though. I will put them in some water when I come home. Hope its not too late. I’m sure icicles will form on them in here though. Today sucks. Hopefully I can scavenge some type of disgusting leftovers from a meeting at work because I’m hungry.